Quieting the Bees

Several years ago my new friend Connie sent me a quick e-mail asking if I'd join her in memorizing Psalm 18. Without a second thought, I whipped off an equally quick reply: "Sure!" At the time I assumed the only Psalms that got memorized were the short ones. Silly, silly me.
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I still hold Connie in extremely high regard, even as our friendship has grown more comfortable, like a stylish shoe that's been worn for a while. If I made the same ill-formed promise to her today, I would simply write back my regrets: "Hey C: Fifty verses? Psalm 18 covers a page and a half in my NIV, for crying out loud!" At the time though, our friendship was a recent development. I was honored at her invitation, and didn't want my new friend to think of me as a spiritual pansy, or a promise-breaker. Flustered, I hit the floor and prayed for a miracle.
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In response, God helped me memorize Psalm 18— me, the over-tired working mom who, thanks to years of sleep deprivation, had the short-term memory of a brick. I enjoyed the process so much that I continued giving myself assignments, learning other beloved chapters of the bible by heart: Romans 8 and 12, Colossians 1, Ephesians 6,  1 Corinthians 13, and on and on. Somewhere along the line, however, I fell out of the practice. 
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Straying from the spiritual discipline of scripture memorization was not intentional. For a long time, I didn't notice I had given it up. If asked, I would have said, "Sure, I memorize verses all of the time!"—like the way I automatically nodded yes when my doctor asked if I still took a multi-vitamin, even though I hadn't uncapped the jar since 2010. 
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Last week I caught myself indulging in destructive thoughts. I was wrapped up in worry about this and that, and the worry was wearing me out. I was sick of it. Driving home from class I tried to remember Psalm 18, to distract my brain with something good. Despite very real effort, I couldn't recall the opening verse; not even the very first word. 
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As soon as I made it home I dropped my bags and huddled on the couch with my petal pink NIV, pouring over the once-familiar poetry of the Psalm, which I am now re-learning. "I love you O Lord, my strength..." Yes, Lord, I do.
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Forcing my brain to memorize God's word rather than letting my thoughts go off on their own, unattended, is like pouring honey over the bees, quieting the drone and rendering their stingers useless. 
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Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. ~ Col 3:1-2 NIV 1984


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Connie Smiley is a treasure. Check out her photography, calligraphy, watercolors and writing:
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